NFL Wrap-Up (Week 1 Version)

Isn't it great to have the NFL back? Well, for most fans it is. For those of you too drunk to remember, here is your weekly NFL Wrap-Up. Based primarily on what I was able to see.

Game of the Week

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at New Orleans Saints. A division battle between two playoff-oriented teams. A great way to start the season, with enough offense and defense to make any fan happy. Honorable Mention to Minnesota at Green Bay and Carolina at San Diego.

Best Team Performance

Philadelphia Eagles. A 38-3 thorough ass-whipping of the St. Louis Lambs, err Rams. McNabb threw for 361 yards and a 131 passer rating, and three separate receivers gained at least 102 yards (DeSean Jackson, Greg Lewis and Hank Baskett). Honorable mention to the Denver Broncos, who won their game against the Oakland Raiders in about 2 minutes.

Least Impressive Team Performance

Oakland Raiders. They just simply looked out of sync the entire game. Dropped passes, missed opportunities (as few as they were), McFadden injured and just out-and-out sloppy play. Russell didn't play awful, so he may be something for the fans to keep watching.

Most Impressive Individual Performance (Offense)

Michael Turner, RB - Atlanta Falcons. 220 on 22 carries, for 2 touchdowns. Welcome to the starting lineup Mr. Turner.

Most Impressive Individual Performance (Defense)
London Fletcher, LB - Washington Redskins. 17 tackles. Just an enormous effort in an uphill game for Fletcher.

Honorable Mention to Charles Grant, DL - New Orleans Saints. He was only credited with 3 solo tackles and 1 sack, but he was a complete disruption in the game against the Buccaneers.

Most Impressive Individual Performance (Special Teams)

Roscoe Parrish - Buffalo Bills. Concussionless and incredibly quick. Changes direction on a dime quicker than anyone in the NFL. His 63 yard punt return for a TD was electric. He could challenge Devin Hester as the most exciting Hurricane return man in the NFL.

Hit of the Week

Philadelphia's Sheldon Brown's hit on St. Louis's Steven Jackson that took his head (OK, his helmet) clean off. Much props to Jackson for popping right up.

Also Kansas City's Bernard Pollard's hit on T ... nah - that's just too mean, and it wasn't that big a hit. (Yep, I am going to hell).

Breakthrough Performance

This should go to Michael Turner, but because he was already mentioned, I am going to give this to his teammate Matt Ryan, QB. Not huge numbers (9-13, 161, 1TD), but a victory for QB-starved Falcons Fans (all 3 of you), plus a TD on his first NFL pass (more on this later).

Also look out for Eddie Royal, WR from Denver, and DeSean Jackson, WR from Philadelphia.

Finally
Reggie Bush, RB - New Orleans Saints. 14 carries for 51 yards, and 8 catches for 112 yards, including a 4th quarter game winning 42 yard TD reception that was practically all run. Is this the Reggie Bush that everyone was expecting? Plus, Kim Kardashian.

Impact Injury

Duh!

But also Nate Burleson, and possibly the combo of Joseph Addai and Dallas Clark. Burleson's injury is really threatening to the Seahawks because with the exception of one Shaun Alexander record setting year, they rely on the passing game. With no starts at WR, they need the collective talents of all of their receivers to really function, especially since their RB's are just not good.

I could also put Shawne Merriman here, but his injury was from so long ago, that he could have been recovered by now. Whoops.

Team Rising

Chicago Bears. Assuming that Kyle Orton can continue his steady play, they might just have the right run/pass mix to have a serviceable offense which complements their dominant defense. Now, I know their defense was not good last year, but the performance against the Colts, with the pressure they put on Manning and the tackling by the linebackers and secondary, especially on the slant patterns, was great. [Ed. note - Probably wishful thinking and Bears homerism.]

Team Falling

Cincinnati Bengals. And fast. Their prolific offense might just be finished, and since their defense never even approached adequate, that spells trouble, Ocho Cinco or no Ocho Cinco.

Best Teams

1. Pittsburgh Steelers
2. Dallas Cowboys
3. Philadelphia Eagles
4. Denver Broncos
5. New York Giants

Worst Teams

32. St. Louis Rams
31. Cincinnati Bengals
30. Seattle Seahawks
29. Oakland Raiders
28. Cleveland Browns

Preview - Game(s) of the Week

3. Indianapolis at Minnesota - The loser falls to a precarious 0-2. Not impossible (See Giants, New York circa 2007), but still not a fun hill to climb.

2. Buffalo at Jacksonville - Time to see if Buffalo is real. Also time to see if Jacksonville peaked last year, or if the Titans just have their number.

1. Philadelphia at Dallas - For division, conference and possibly league supremacy.

Trivia

Who was the last quarterback before Matt Flynn to throw at TD on his first NFL attempt? Answers in the comment section. Answer provided next week.

Reason #1 We Hate Rich People

Sean "Puffy, P. Diddy, Diddy, Whatever He Will Be Called Next" is a very successful entrepreneur and rapper. [Ed. Note - He really is not a good rapper]. He has made quite a name for himself as a rapper, music and television producer, clothing line originator, and now vodka hawker and because of his bountiful successes, he has amassed quite a fortune. And, like almost any man, he has learned how to flaunt that fortune with the best of them, including purchasing his own private plane.

However, Mr. Combs not only has grounded his plane in lieu of flying commercial airlines, but he has also gone public with this information saying that because of rising fuel prices, he has not been able to continue to fly his private jet anymore. In addition, he said, "Give a shout-out to all my Saudi Arabia brothers and sisters and all the brothers and sisters in all the countries that have oil—if you could please send me some oil for my jet, I would truly appreciate it." Combs continued "Tell whoever the next president is, we need to bring gas prices down....I can't believe I'm flying commercial.".

Well, you know what Mr. Diddy, we can't believe you are flying commercial either. And while you are begging, why don't you ask for some fuel for those that need it to travel to see family across the country, rather than those that try to maintain a lavish lifestyle on both coasts.

I am not one to pass judgment on the rich to be able to do whatever they are able to do, especially if they have worked hard for, and earned, their money. Someday I hope to be that rich.

However, don't try to pass your sad tales like not being able to maintain your private plane to the regular folks who are having problems maintaining their automobile that takes them to and from their minimum wage jobs to support their family.

So, reason #1 why I hate rich people is that once they become famous, they think we care about their perceived money problems, when the only problems they have to face are superficial.

Little League Legend

I am a little late to the editorializing about this situation, but it took me awhile to figure out who exactly was to blame.

Jerricho Scott is a 9 year old little league [editor's note - not Little League, but rather a different organization for developing players] pitcher in New Haven, Connecticut who happens to throw around 40 miles per hour. Apparently, he was scaring opposing hitters to the point where he was told that he could no longer pitch in his league, but that he could continue pitching if he moved up an age bracket. (It is my understanding that 40 mph is not necessarily fast for 9 - 10 year olds, and that Scott has not hit a batter all year). Scott did not pitch in his first game after being told not to pitch, as it was not his usual game in the rotation. However, in the following game, his coach told Scott that he was going to pitch. Upon taking the mound, the competing team's coach had his players leave the field, despite the protestations of the player's themselves. (One of the stories is that the team was 0-8 and their coach wanted the forfeit victory).

One of the allegations is that Scott turned down an offer to play on a different team in that league (the defending champs apparently), and that a board member that banned Scott from pitching was an employee of the defending champs' sponsor.

That, of course, is the Cliff's Notes version, and I am sure that as the (sure to be filed) lawsuit progresses we will hear all types of allegations and excuses, but for right now, I want to figure out who to blame. Here are my 5 people that I feel are the most to blame.

5. Overzealous parents who want their teams to win at all costs. Their ridiculous attitude has led to the development of sports and leagues where nobody wins, nobody keeps score, and everybody just has a good time. This is sports. Kids need to learn how to win, and how to lose. It's part of growing up. If you want your kid to have fun only, then take them somewhere else.

4. Ridiculous parents who don't want to hurt anybodies' feelings, let alone the children. Your kids' feelings will not be permanently damaged because one pitcher is better than them. Your kid won't be permanently damaged if all the pitchers are better than them. Your kids will bounce back. If they aren't good at baseball, try music, soccer, art, pick-up-sticks, whatever. Hell, try all of them. Let the kid figure out what he is good at. It might not be baseball, it might be photography. Who cares.

3. Johnnie Bell of Stuart, Florida - Because he was the pitcher that threw 1000 miles per hour and was the first to have the wicked curve ball that scared everyone in my league. I don't blame him for being good or for the Jerricho Scott situation, but I blame him for ending my baseball career.

2. Parents and bureaucrats that think it is alright to skirt the rules, or change them altogether. If Scott was allowed to pitch at the beginning of the season, let him pitch at the end of the season. The board members of that little league should be absolutely ashamed of themselves.

1. YALE! - It was New Haven, after all.

Wh, What's Your Fantasy

My fantasy baseball draft was a couple of weekends ago. Now, ordinarily I would never want to bore our readers with my tremendously insightful logic about who I picked in what round and why. However, since the fantasy draft took place during a Saturday night I was unable to attend my live draft. That makes it much more entertaining for me to completely fabricate all of the reasons for my draft. It is this type of insightful analysis that should carry you to your fantasy baseball season championship.

The ground rules for our league: 12 teams; serpentine draft; 6 x 6 rotisserie scoring (average, HRs, RBIs, SBs, OPS, W, K, S, Holds, ERA, WHIP); 24 rounds; Standard offensive starters with 9 pitchers (4 SP, 4RP, 1P). I received the 12th pick in the draft. Onward to my draft.

The obvious picks of ARod (1st), Pujols (6) and Johan Santana (10th) were already gone, as were David Wright (2nd), Hanley Ramirez (3rd), Ryan Braun (4th), Jose Reyes (5th), Alfonso Soriano (7th), Chase Utley (8th) and Matt Holliday (9th). Due to Braun, Soriano, Wright and Utley all being over selected, I was going to be left with 2 of my third, fifth and sixth ranked selections. When the pick in front of me selected Miguel Cabrera (my preseason number 3 ranked player ... and rising), I ended up with Ryan Howard in my lap. Since I also had the wrap-around pick to start he second round, I also selected Carl Crawford. So far so good in this draft.

A note on my rankings. I pre-selected my top 60 (5 rounds approximately), but I did so by legitimately placing the top 20, then overstuffing the next 10-15 picks with pitchers to make sure I received a ton of good pitchers, then rounding out the last set with players from various positions. This should enable me to receive more than 5 rounds worth of my selections before yahoo starts automatically dumping players onto my roster.

The second round sees a lot of familiar names, Ichiro, Fielder, Rollins and Peavy, and also Chris Young the outfielder, Carlos Beltran and Lance Berkman stretches. Some nice picks in the third round, Magglio Ordonez going 35 for example, but some more early stretches for position, Russell Martin, Mark Texeira and Chone Figgins. The draft allows Manny Ramirez (my 18th rated player) to fall to me at 36 [Ed. Note - Ramirez is on pace to score 162 and drive in 648 runs]. I also pick Brandon Webb (my 20th rated player) of Arizona with the 37th pick. So far I have average, power, speed with Crawford and the ability to score and drive in runs. Although only 1 pitcher, he is a perennial Cy Young candidate, and remember, I overstocked my rankings with pitchers.


Some nice players drafted in the 4th round, Sabathia, Alex Rios, Adam Dunn, Aramis Ramirez, and the first closer, Papelbon, but some real stretches also, like Troy Tulowizki and Brian Roberts, and some injury questions like Josh Beckett. The 5th round is more of the same, although I was a bit distraught to see Cole Hamels taken 3 spots in front of me, the only real pick that I was upset about in those two rounds. With the 60th and 61st picks, I get Carlos Zambrano and Roy Halladay. Can you believe it? Three pitchers, three Cy Young candidates.

A quarter of the way through my draft and my team looks like this (I am very pleased at this point, by the way):

C, 1B - Ryan Howard, 2B, 3B, SS, OF - Carl Crawford, OF, Manny Ramirez, OF, Util
SP - Brandon Webb, SP - Carlos Zambrano, SP - Roy Halladay, SP, RP, RP, RP, RP, P

The sixth and seventh round eliminate Justin Verlander, Carlos Pena, Roy Oswalt, Aaron Harang, Scott Kazmir, Joe Mauer and Gary Sheffield from the draft pool, but the likes of Adrian Gonzalez, Torii Hunter and Brian McCann are also taken. Once again, I am not displeased with the progression of these rounds. This leads to my selctions, in the seventh and eighth rounds respectively, of Felix Hernanzez and Ben Sheets. Hernandez has a ton of potential, and remember is still incredibly young, despite his experience. If Sheets can stay healthy, he is an absolute stud on the mound. More pitching for me.

Tim Lincecum, Ryan Zimmerman and Mariano Rivera are the most interesting names that are taken in the eighth and ninth rounds ahead of me, but Brett Myers and Chad Bilingsley are available when I pick. Brett Myers and Chad Billingsley are great because they count both as starters and relief pitchers in the yahoo leagues due to their appearances last year, although they will both be used as starters. Billingsley has had a very subpar spring training, but he has outstanding stuff. Looking forward to watching him pitch in the next few years. More importantly, I am through ten rounds without having yahoo assign me one single player.

Rounds 11 and 12 bring me Johnny Damon and Rickie Weeks. With Damon, he should score a ton of runs at the top of that lineup and have decent production [Ed. note - notice me talking myself into this pick]. Thank God defense isn't a criteria in fantasy sports. He might just have a weaker arm than Juan Pierre. Maybe. With Weeks, decent production from the 2B spot. I still hope that yahoo does me a bit better for this position. [Ed. Note - Foreshadowing].

Halfway through the draft my team looks like this (and I am still very much pleased):

C, 1B - Ryan Howard, 2B - Rcikie Weeks, 3B, SS, OF - Carl Crawford, OF, Manny Ramirez, OF - Johnny Damon, Util
SP - Brandon Webb, SP - Carlos Zambrano, SP - Roy Halladay, SP - Felix Hernandez, RP - Brett Myers, RP - Chad Billingsley, RP, RP, P - Ben Sheets

At this point I need a few position players (and yes, closers, I know this). Yahoo does not let me down with my next four picks being Matt Kemp of the Dodgers, Jarrod Saltalamacchia of the Rangers, Josh Fields of the White Sox and Jhonny Peralta of the Indians. Kemp has the capability of being a really nice fantasy player, as do Saltalamacchia and Fields. Unfortunately for me, Saltalamacchia and Fields will both most likely start the season in the minors. Peralta is a great pick because (a) he is a great fantasy pick in the 16th round; and (b) every team needs at least one player that cannot spell his own name. The next round brings my relief pitching in the form of B.J. Ryan and Pat Neshak. Neshak is an absolute beast in a league where holds are a scoring category. Great WHIP, great ERA, a ton of holds. He helps everywhere. They only players I was upset at missing during this quarter of the draft were Kosuke Fukudome (round 14 - mostly because of his name), Kevin Youkilis (round 15) and Hideki Okajima (round 17). I had Okajima and Neshak in my bullpen last year and they were amazing.

My team to this point (still pleased, but cognizant of holes to be filled):

C - Jarrod Saltalamachia, 1B - Ryan Howard, 2B - Rickie Weeks, 3B - Josh Fields, SS - Jhonny Peralta, OF - Carl Crawford, OF, Manny Ramirez, OF - Johnny Damon, Util - Matt Kemp
SP - Brandon Webb, SP - Carlos Zambrano, SP - Roy Halladay, SP - Felix Hernandez, RP - Brett Myers, RP - Chad Billingsley, RP - B.J. Ryan, RP - Pat Neshek, P - Ben Sheets

At this point I am just drafting to fill holes, as I have at least one player at each of my starting positions. Time to bring in another catcher, another middle infielder, some more runs scored, and not hurt my batting average. On to the last six rounds.

The 19th round brings the absolute steal of the draft. Placido Polanco, second baseman of the Tigers. IN THE 19TH ROUND. He hit .341 and scored 105 runs last year. He is hitting second in a lineup behind Granderson (when he returns), and in front of Cabrera, Ordonez AND Sheffield. Are you serious? I'll take this pick anytime.

My next picks are all position players as well. Next is Edwin Encarnacion, who provides me with insurance in case Fields starts the season in the minors. He hit .289 last year with 16 homers, 76 RBIs, 66 runs scored and 8 stolen bases. He is followed by Colby Rasmus (who?), Julio Lugo, Casey Kotchman, and Paul LoDuca. LoDuca helps because he will actually play and Saltalamacchia might not. Lugo is a shortsop, and you always need shortstops. Kotchman and Rasmus have already been cut for more pitching, including Schilling, who I immediately placed on the DL just in case he does come back, David Weathers (for saves) and Matt Guerrier for bullpen help.

After the draft, my team looks like this:

C - Jarrod Saltalamachia, 1B - Ryan Howard, 2B - Placido Polanco, 3B - Edwin Encarnacion, SS - Jhonny Peralta, OF - Carl Crawford, OF, Manny Ramirez, OF - Johnny Damon, Util - Matt Kemp, B - Rickie Weeks, B - Josh Fields, B - Julio Lugo B - Paul LoDuca, B - Colby Rasmus (since waived) and B - Casey Kotchman (since waived).
SP - Brandon Webb, SP - Carlos Zambrano, SP - Roy Halladay, SP - Felix Hernandez, RP - Brett Myers, RP - Chad Billingsley, RP - B.J. Ryan, RP - Pat Neshek, P - Ben Sheets

Take a look at the team again, but think of it as an actual lineup.

OF - Carl Crawford
2B - Placido Polanco
1B - Ryan Howard
OF - Manny Ramirez
DH - Matt Kemp
3B - Edwin Encarnacion
C - Jarrod Saltalamacchia
SS - Jhonny Peralta
OF - Johnny Damon

More importantly, check out the pitching rotation: Brandon Webb, Carlos Zambrano, Roy Halladay, Felix Hernandez, Ben Sheets, Brett Myers and Chad Billingsley with a bullpen consisting of B.J. Ryan, David Weathers, Pat Neshek and Matt Guerrier. A little short on saves, but other than that, completely solid. You couldn't find one team in the majors that would want to face this pitching staff.