THE SEMI-FINALS

THE SEMI-FINALS

Day 2

Saturday, April 2, 2016

Game Day is finally here.  Sinickal is hopeful that his Orange will win.  Tony is hopeful that we remember to pick up Corey at the airport.  Pepster is hopeful that we can find some places to quench our thirst.

07:47 – Pepster awakens and watches Chelsea.  Since he forgot we are in the central time zone, the game is already at halftime.

09:10 – Sinickal awakens, and chastises Pepster for watching soccer.

09:47 – Tony awakens and asks Pepster for the soccer scores.  Sinickal is already livid.

10:00 – For the second consecutive year, Pepster, Sinickal and Tony miss the NCAA Final Four Mile Run.  Racecar didn’t expect them to run, and Allison is now livid.  Neither of them is in Houston, however.

10:04 – While finishing typing up the Day 1 blog, spell check corrects “bar back” to “bareback”. 

10:12 – The beginning of all kinds of jokes as we remember Day 1.

11:27 – Getting ready to head out, we have our first beer of the day, a St. Arnold’s Weedwacker, and by we, we mean “Pepster”.  This isn’t to call out Pepster for drinking before noon, but to mention this was the second six-pack left by the hosts as our welcome gift.  Pretty tasty Hefeweizen.

11:31 – Pam, after reading the blog post from yesterday, writes us to explain that the My Little Pony we could not remember was basically what the Middle Tennessee State mascot looks like.  We all instantly remember the conversation, begin to laugh, and then have no idea how to adequately explain that to our readers.

11:38 – Parked in EADO, right on the street near a few establishments.  Cross the street to Lucky’s – I told you yesterday that we would end up there at some point – and an SUV is in the street trying to turn into a plaza no greater than 2 ½ feet away from us.  The only problem is a car is coming out of that same plaza.  SUV driver backs up, and instead of letting the car out first, peels out down the street missing another car by mere inches.  It is way too early for people to be this out of control.

11:39 – Enter Lucky’s.  As you might recall, this is the Syracuse host bar.  Sinickal is at home here.

11:42 – Sinickal tells the waitress that “It is too early to drink.  I’ll have a Bud Light”.

11:49 – They have an appetizers called “Ball’s Out”.

11:50 – Pepster orders the “Balls Out”.

11:52 – Lucky’s is definitely a sports bar, and has sports paraphernalia hanging on the walls.  Pepster notes a particular framed jersey with the last name “Campbell” on it, and says, “Look, an Earl Campbell Tennessee Titans jersey”.  Every Houston resident within earshot cringes.

12:03 – 3 people in their twenties walk in; one of them is wearing a North Carolina polo.  The entire bar, which is now almost packed, boos.  They walk out.

12:40 – A family wearing Oklahoma gear walks in and sits at the table next to us.  The father makes some comment about how many Syracuse fans are in the place, Sinickal tells him that it is the official Syracuse bar.  The man, in a long, slow twang says, “I missed the memo”, with “memo” now being a 5 syllable word.  Tony responds, “And elocution class”.

12:47 – Sinickal finds an article on Deadspin on how Rudy – the movie and the person - are just awful.  He proceeds to read us the funniest lines of the article.  Sinickal then reads the entire article.

13:47 – We walk across the street to find another establishment where we see some smokers all fired up at Eado (a restaurant named after the neighborhood).  We hear a guy by the smoker on the telephone say, “Just don’t go eat at Lucky’s”.  We chat with this guy for a few minutes.  He is the owner of Eado and he proceeds to tell us – among the rest of his life story – that the smoked meats and veggies will be done in 10 minutes.  We tell him we ate at Lucky’s.

13:48 – See four guys walking on the street and the owner yells out “Hey Tech – 10 minutes".  None of us truly processed just what happened.

13:49 – Owner takes us inside to the bar, introduces us to Katie his bartender, a rather tall woman who played college volleyball at “Illinois”.  Katie corrects her owner immediately by saying “Illinois State”.  Owner says, “Whatever”.

13:51 – As we try to decide if Katie truly is that tall, or if the floor behind the bar is elevated, Sinickal asks if she is truly 6’5” or 6’6”.  She says that she is 6’2”, the floor is not elevated and that we all (except for Tony) are pretty much on the same level.  Sinickal responds, “WE – are not on the same level”.  (This is a dig at us, not her).

14:00 – We now comprehend what just happened twelve minutes ago, as Tech N9ne and four of his, let’s say staff, stroll up to the smoker and order some food.  It turns out he is in on the NCAA concert agenda opening for Kendrick Lamar.  As an aside, Pepster is really pissed about the concert schedule.  Kendrick plays tonight at 7 – which is during the semi-finals.  Who can be at both places at the same time?  Hopefully we can catch some of the Sunday concerts.

14:32 – Corey – a University of Rhode Island alumnus who has no rooting interest in the specific Final Four teams and is just in Houston for the fun trip, and to support his boy Sinickal – lands.

14:56 – On the drive back from the airport Corey asks, “Was it good last night?  Did a lot of people come early?”  Sinickal immediately lashes back “Yesterday wasn’t early.  Yesterday was on time”.

15:05 – Interstate was crowded so we drove completely unused surface roads.  Tony notices sarcastically, “an up-and-coming” neighborhood.

15:12 – Corey recalls when he and Pepster first met; which is also the last time they saw each other.  October 2003, Pepster was at a conference in Washington, and at night would meet Sinickal out to watch playoff baseball.  That year was both Bartman and Aaron “Fucking” Boone.  Corey – a Sox fan – who knows that Sinickal is a Cubs fan, remarks that “That was a tough time.”  Corey forgot Pepster is a Marlins fan! That was a pretty good year for baseball.

15:26 – Corey’s first beer.  He chooses the St. Arnold’s Weedwacker.

15:27 – Pepster walks upstairs and says, “Uh-Oh”.

15:28 – Tony walks downstairs and says, “Uh-Oh”.

15:29 – Pepster and Tony to Corey, “Does Sinickal know”

15:30 – Before he answers, Sinickal notices Corey is wearing a North Carolina polo.  Initial inquiry reveals he is wearing it in support of a female friend who is a North Carolina alumna because “she asked him too”.  Corey is not sleeping with this woman, nor, he claims, is he trying to do so.  Sinickal is livid and vows to not speak to Corey for the rest of that trip, quickly takes back that comment and vows to annihilate him.  (For those that don’t remember, North Carolina is playing Syracuse).

15:38 – As we walk toward Main Street, we pass through an entirely empty parking lot of the Houston Dynamo soccer stadium.  A police car pulls up to the locked entrance gate with its lights on.  It turns out a homeless man is lying in the shade by a tree and some bushes.  Sinickal, channeling the officers, says “Not today, we have customers in town.  You’ve got to get up”.  Then we immediately here the female officer say, “You’ve got to get up”.  There you go.

16:10 – Enter Shay McShay’s.  Immediately realize we are in the central time zone.

16:36 – Light rail to NRG Stadium a/k/a Reliant Park.

17:09 – Tip-off to game 1.  Silas refuses to sit next to Corey.  This isn’t even the Syracuse – North Carolina game yet.

Radio silence – watching basketball.

19:11 – Ass kicking completed.  Villanova destroys Oklahoma in the largest blowout in Final Four history.  Pepster remembers the South Park football episode where the announcer says (paraphrasing) – I haven’t seen a beating that bad since Poland 1939.

19:53 – Tip-off to game 2.  Silas refuses to take a picture with Corey.  This is going to get bad.

Radio silence – watching basketball.

21:17 – Sinickal finds a tweet from ESPN sports and business analyst Darren Rovell which states, “Tonight’s attendance at Final Four: 75,505.  Fans who can actually see something: 25,505”.  Sounds about right.

21:48 – Game over.

21:59 – Knowing that the light rail is going to be a mess, we contemplate using Uber.  Type destination as “Bar we haven’t been to yet”.

22:01 – Sinickal asks Corey if he bought the shirt specifically for this trip.  Corey says, “No”.  Pepster then inquires, “Is she your size?”

22:28 – Walk to the light rail station complete.  By the looks of it, we have a 45 minute to an hour wait until we can actually get on a train going north (where everybody else is going).  We immediately step onto the southbound train (on purpose).

22:31 – Exit southbound train and immediately board the empty northbound train.

22:34 – Train stops back at Reliant Stadium stop – is immediately filled to capacity.  Two women sit in the chairs next to Pepster and Corey wearing North Carolina gear.  Pepster tells Corey that he is now “among his people” while telling the women that Corey has been a fan of North Carolina “for all of 3 hours now”.

22:50 – 23:02 – Sinickal continues his rant of destruction on Corey.  Explains the situation to the entire train car, adding useful details along the way.  Once he gets to the part “He isn’t even sleeping with her”, the entire car laughs hysterically.

23:03 – Sinickal takes a poll among those remaining in the car as to who is right Sinickal or Corey.  Corey tries to defend himself by saying “I was not rooting against Syracuse; I was cheering for college basketball”.  The quick response, “Your shirt doesn’t say ‘college basketball’”.  The verdict is unanimous.  Not nearly unanimous, but literally unanimous.

23:05 – Sinickal amends the poll to say, “Who is the worse bandwagon fan, Corey or Drake?”.  Not quite as unanimous, but still lopsided.

23:14 – Back to Molly’s primarily because it is right at the train stop.

23:19 – Sinickal refuse to include Corey in the toast.

23:26 – While upstairs at Molly’s, some random girl stops at the door frame at the top of the stairs, “dances” for about 5 seconds, and then dashes down the stairs.  That is our cue to leave.

23:37 – Enter Live Sports Bar’s tiki roof.  The weather is actually much warmer than we thought it was going to be.  A rooftop bar is just what we needed at this point in time.  Perhaps things will “cool off” between Sinickal and Corey.

23:39 – Sinickal will not let Corey have a beer from the bucket Tony bought.

23:40 – The big screen television is still on TBS even though the game ended.  There is no sound as a DJ is spinning.  Some game show is on, and it is hysterical in silence.  We all agree that it probably is awful if the sound was on.  (Later research reveals the name of the show is Separation Anxiety).

23:47 – The question on the game show is “If your boyfriend got a little yellowtail last night, what did he eat”.  If ever there was a time when we need D’Angelo Russell (Hopps) to be in attendance.  He should have been here.

00:10 – Two white girls doing the “Miss Mary Mack” hand jive to Gin and Juice.  That is our cue.

00:15 – Enter Dean’s.  By far the best scenery so far.  As an aside, Houston is not an attractive city.

00:19 – Bobby, a friend of Tony’s arrives and joins us at Dean’s.

00:29 – “Wearing the hell out of that jumper” is not a phrase you would normally expect to hear.

00:35 – Bobby is now read-in to the Corey/North Carolina shirt situation.  Bobby agrees with the rest of humanity.

00:36 – Sinickal glosses Corey, “Doug Christie”.  [Editor’s Note:  For those that do not understand this reference, search any Bill Simmons writing about Doug Christie].

00:51 – Enter the Little Dipper.

01:03 – See an incredibly tall white guy that Sinickal thinks we all should know.  Pepster believes he looks like a Zeller.  Sinickal tells Doug Christie to go say hi since, “He is one of your people”.

01:12 – Pepster sees a kid wearing a “Use the F=MA” shirt.  Now, we get the point.  It is a nerdy way of saying “Use the force”.  But, to be accurate, the shirt would have to say “Use the M x A”, as mass times acceleration is force.  What the shirt actually says is “Use the force equals mass times acceleration”.  If you are going to try to use your nerdom to be funny, you better make it accurate.  We decide against pointing this out to him.

01:25 – Enter the Original OKRA Charity Saloon.  This bar used to be an alley.  With immaculate tress work overhead and adding a brick entryway, somebody connected two buildings and turned it into a bar.  This place looks amazing!

01:35 – Girl walks by with a shirt that says “High Heels, High Hopes”.

01:55 – Last call song is End of the Road by Boyz II Men.  The entire, packed bar, is singing.

02:16 – Home for the night.

02:17-02:55 – Continue roasting of Doug Christie, who still proclaims his innocence.  Sinickal determines that he is going to destroy Doug Christie the rest of the weekend, even if it causes him to lose brain cells.  “I don’t care if it makes me dumber”.