For those of you that thought I was actually going to write a column about soccer, you clearly do not know me that well. Although someday it may cross my mind to pontificate on the various ways to easily make the sport more exciting and better, today is not that day. Today is the day to single out soccer's most easily exported commodity to the rest of the sporting community, the flop!
Now, the flop is nothing new, and the fact that the San Antonio Spurs employ this, ahem, tactic, is also nothing new. Plenty of writers, bloggers and mainstream, have commented on this very topic. What makes this year's playoffs a bit different is the pervasiveness of the flop, as well as the four different manifestations employed by the Spurs.
The first, and most obvious flop, is where an off-the-ball defender attempts to draw a charge from an offensive player that is driving to the basket. The defender steps into the lane, and falls dramatically to the ground, perhaps with a George Ackles type yell, prior to contact, or falls overly dramatically after very, very minimal contact. This flop is best evidenced on the Spurs by Ginobili, and historically by Vlade Divac and Dennis Rodman. Although Rodman would jump in the air parallel to the ground and then fall, most floppers today go straight back, landing on their shorts for maximum sliding under the basket (OK, I may have done this once or twice in high school).
The second flop I call the Manu Ginobili special, although Tony Parker is fast becoming adept at this maneuver. The setup for this flop is on offense while making a usually ill-advised drive to the basket between several defenders. While driving to the basket, the offensive player either jumps into the defender at his side or hesitates slightly causing contact with the defender at his back. After causing the contact, the offensive player throws the ball toward the basket and then flies approximately 326 feet away. The fact that the ball kisses gently off the backboard and often through the rim belies the ferocity of the contact which the shooter wishes to convey. Again, this is exemplified by Ginobili, and sometimes Parker.
The third flop is a standard post defensive maneuver. The post defender and the offensive player are banging for position. Immediately before one of the "bangs", the post defender stops his momentum, absorbs some of the contact and then falls backward creating the offensive foul. Note, it isn't technically a flop if you catch an elbow in the chest or sternum, that is a deserved foul. This flop is evendenced by a ton of Spurs, but especially Tim Duncan, Robert Horry and even Kurt Thomas, and historically by Bill Laimbeer and Rick Mahorn. This is the evolutionary heir to the pulling the chair defense at which Mahorn excelled. Mahorn would bang with an offensive player, and then right before the next expected hit, he would stop and avoid contact, as if pulling the chair out from under the post player, who, expecting the contact, would often travel.
The fourth flop is something I have never actually seen before these playoffs, at least not often. It occurs when the offense is on a fast break with a defensive player trying and failing to get proper defensive position, usually leaving him running beside the offensive player. The defender initiates a subtle hand check on the offensive player, who then slaps the hand away, causing the defender to fly into the stands at full speed. Bruce Bowen is the master of this maneuver, having done it twice in the past two games.
In the interest of full disclosure, I am not a Laker or Spur fan, just calling it like I see it. In fact, I would love to see Duncan win another ring, Bowen irritate the hell out of Paul Pierce, Richard Hamilton or Tayshaun Prince, and being Hispanic (well, at least half), I have to cheer for the greatest Hispanic basketball player ever, Ginobili. However, these Spurs have gone absolutely too far. It is almost as if they are playing soccer. Perhaps it is because Ginobili and Fabricio Oberto are both from soccer mad, and perennially dangerous, Argentina or perhaps it is because they are a year older as a team and losing a step of quickness. Whatever the reason, it has to stop. Now if only the officials could give them a red card.
With all this flopping, you would have thought that Brent Barry would have gone to the line last night when legitimate contact was made by Derek Fisher on the last play of the game. Oh well, at least the NHL playoffs are on tonight, and that is a league that doesn't tolerate flopping. Now, do I have the Home and Garden Network so I can watch the game?
